Reading a blog I follow the other day, I was hit, as if by a freight train, by one simple sentence :
I was amazed by the effect it had on me. I sat looking at it for a time, trying to soak it in, trying to feel the weight of it, trying to comprehend it. A number of times I read on, but I kept coming back to it. Rereading it. Looking at it. Dumbstruck by the power of it. Flabbergasted by its relevance to me.
You see, I’ve wanted for a number of years now to sit down. To just sit down quietly and relax. To take a breath. To pull my life back to myself. To take hold of it. To get a grip.
” Viv, I just want to sit down. ” I’ve said this numerous times to Viv. She understands what I mean and why. She herself wants the same as she has been through the mill over the years. In fact, we spoke about it only yesterday and agreed that it seems to be next to impossible to find that side of a mountain where one can just ” be “.
My dad, who was 90 on his last birthday, understands too. ” Dad, I just want to sit down, ” was an answer I gave recently to a query of his. I didn’t feel the need to explain to him. He knows what I’ve gone through. He understood. He’s been through the mill.
So, when I saw LIFE IS ABSURD in black and white before me, I felt blown away and flattened ! ( I’m not sure if it’s possible to have those opposites happen at the same time !! Quantum physics may have something to say about that. However, I digress ! ) I realised that there is no point in me hoping for life to ” calm down ” because it won’t. It’s not the nature of life and living. Ok, certain issues may be resolved, certain plans may come to fruition, Viv and I will get to sit down together at some point, but to expect to reach a still point is unrealistic because …
life, is indeed, absurd.
Here is a link to the blog I mentioned at the beginning of this post. Do visit, as John is well worth a read :